Thursday, 28 March 2013

Something is definitely afoot!

Today is Friday and both Mum and Dad are at home.  Hmmm...unusual.

The day started as it usually does with treats and a post -treat snooze and then Heidi and I decided to have a game of tug of war.

                                                                                        Heidi won.  She was very pleased with herself.

I was exhausted.  Tug of war is a very tiring game.

Dad went out to mow the grass and Mum was messing around with the washing machine and the bedsheets and stuff like that.  Everything seemed to be under control when I was pounced upon by Mum and taken outside to have a bath under the garden hose.  It was very undignified and quite chilly too. I was shivering. Mum said I was a wuss.

Then a quick towel down and I was put into the pool room to dry off completely.  One is not allowed inside when one is in any way damp...or muddy....or smelly. (House Rules according to Mum)

Heidi was also hose-bathed and eventually joined me in the pool room.  We rested and tried to get ourselves dry as quickly as possible while watching Dad washing the patio with the pressure sprayer.
Heidi observed that it was a blessing that Mum did not use the pressure spray on us.

Some time later we were brushed (which I really enjoyed) and issued with bones.

Now, I ask you, is this normal?  We are washed. We are fed bones. There are a million trillion cans of dog food in the garage. A lot of cleaning is going on.  Humans have not gone off to work as they usually do.  Hmmm.
Something is definitely afoot!

Wednesday, 27 March 2013

Something is afoot!

The great detective Heidi Ho has announced to me that something is afoot.

I have been so busy being an OCD….Outstandingly Clever (and Beautiful and Busy) Dog...that I hadn't noticed what Mum has been up to lately.

In the garage there is an old book case. Mum keeps our cans of food on the shelves there. Usually,  when I use all my toes to count them, there are about four paws worth of cans there. HoHo says that is sixteen.  Well, right now, there are so many cans in there that we don't have enough toes to count them. We have used up all our toes twice and there are still more that that!!!!

                                                     Something is afoot.

Why has Mum started bringing home so much dog food?  Not that I am complaining, you understand. One could not possibly have too much dog food but this is definitely odd behaviour, even for Mum.

Heidi has wondered if we are getting another dog.  I don't think so.  What would Mum and Dad need another dog for when they have us?  We do our best to keep them on their toes.  What more could they possibly want from us?

Heidi says there are extra treat packets in the kitchen cupboards too.  Hmmmm.

                                                    Something is definitely afoot.

Thursday, 21 March 2013


Today is Friday. We like Fridays because Mum doesn't go to work. She stays home with us so we can go for a walk and have treats in the middle of the day. All good stuff!!
So today I thought I would do something nice for Mum.
You might remember that Mum has a thing about collecting all of our 'leavings' in the garden.  She really seems to enjoy picking them up each day. So I thought I would make it easier for her by putting my offering in a place where she would be able to find it easily and not have to go searching all over the yard.  I considered the issue carefully and decided to put my little gift right outside the laundry door so that, when Mum opened the door, there it would be.  How thoughtful am I?
So imagine my surprise when she didn't enjoy the experience at all.
She opened the door as I had anticipated she would. She stepped out and found my deposit.  Easy!
Is it my fault she stepped out without looking down?
Apparently it is.
Humans!  You just can't please them sometimes.

Thursday, 7 March 2013

A Day in the Life

4.40 am        
All quiet.....sleeping in my little cubby house bed.  Heidi's cubby is next to mine. She is sleeping too.
4.45 am        
Sleep disturbed as a flying newspaper crashes into the roll-a-door of the garage.
4.50 am      
The door into the house opens. I open one eye and watch as Mum gropes her way to the    
outside door to let the day in.  It isn't light yet so I close my eye and go back to sleep.
5.15 am         
Otto ( the Rat who claims to be a dog) is creating a disturbance out near the back fence.
I trot out to investigate and find that Kahlua is sitting on the fence singing at Otto.
Kahlua is a chocolate brown, exotic-looking cat who has lived in her house as long as
we have lived in ours. We have adopted a non-interference policy towards each other
as long as there is no crossing the property line. Otto sees me and scuttles off back to his
Rat basket on the back deck of his house. Kahlua transfers herself up onto the water tank
and begins her yoga style washing routine. Everything else in the garden appears to be
where I left it last night so I go back to bed.
5.30 am        
The truck that steals our rubbish comes past very noisily. Mum doesn't seem to mind
that this happens every week. Odd.
5.40 am        
Dad goes off to work.  We go down to the bedroom to see if Mum wants company. She
doesn't.  She tells us to go back to sleep. Heidi heads off to curl up on the big chair. I go
outside for a bathroom break and am attacked by the palm tree which, for no apparent
reason, decides to throw one of its frondy branchy things at me.  I get a big fright and
run back in to Heidi. She explains that palm trees are erratic creatures and cannot be
relied upon to remain calm at all times. This worries me as I have treasures buried out
there.  Back to sleep on the couch. Resolve to check on my treasures later.
8.00 am        
Finally......Mum decides that it is breakfast time.  Treats are served.  All is well in my
10.10 am      
Left to mind the house while Mum goes out to the shops.  Heidi says it is my shift so
she settles down for a nap while I patrol outside.
11.20 am      
Mum returns with bags of food and a special treat for us. Bones! Yummo!
12.10 pm    
Post bone nap.
12.30 pm    
Mum won't share lunch.  Otto is barking at Kahlua again.  She likes to torment him
by sitting on the fence and swinging her tail down towards him.  I go with Mum to
bring the mail in.
1.00 pm      
Mum and I go out for a walk. Heidi stays at home. She is allowed to stay in the house to          keep an eye on things.  Mum takes me down to the lake and we check out the water dragons, ducks and turtles. I see the signs that say dogs are not allowed to swim in the lake. Pfft!  I love my walk. I hold my tail high and snort happily as I walk. Mum laughs at me and says I am a 'Nutbag'.  Huh?
1.45 pm      
Home alone. It is Heidi's turn for a walk. I have been restricted to the garage and the yard
because, apparently, I am not to be trusted to stay in the house without supervision.
I am insulted and decide to dig up my treasures and chew them a bit.
2.20 pm      
Mum and Heidi come back. I quickly re-bury the sock I am eating and hurry in to
welcome them.  Mum says I look guilty. Who? Me?
2.25 pm      
Post walk nap.
3.00 pm      
Mum won't share afternoon tea biscuits.
3.35 pm         
Help Mum bring washing in from washing line.  I am a great help especially with the
folding of sheets.
4.15 pm      
Dad comes home.  Welcome him with enthusiasm. He says we are 'Nutbags'. Huh?
4.30 pm      
Dad will not share cheese and crackers.  We love cheese!!!!
5.28 pm      
Heidi takes up position beside her dish in the poolroom.
5.30 pm      
Dinner is served...right on time.  Way to go, Mum!
6.00 pm      
Post dinner nap.
6.30 pm      
Watch over Mum as she makes dinner for herself and Dad.  Helpfully dispose of any meaty
off cuts.
7.00 pm      
Mum and Dad won't share dinner.
7.30 pm      
Evening patrol of back yard.  Possums are starting to bark and growl. The man next door
feeds them and they are trying to get him to come out with their oranges.  I give them a good barking. Mum orders me inside.  Pfft!!
7.45 pm      
Pre supper nap.
9.30 pm      
Dad makes cup of tea for Mum.....smells nice.....she says it is Chai tea.
10.15 pm    
Time for bed.  Treats are served.  One last check of the yard. Manage to get past palm
trees without being attacked.  One last bark at stupid possums. Mum says goodnight and closes the back door. Heidi is already in her cubby snoring.  I curl up in my cubby and settle myself down.  It has been a big day.  I need a nice long snooze.