Friday, 30 November 2012


Recently a new member was added to our family. Our humans, Katie and Todd, have now increased their family with one Australian bulldog by the name of Bruiser.
For a long time we were not allowed to meet him because he was just a baby and hadn't even had all his shots yet.  Apparently, until one has had all ones' shots one must avoid the company of other dogs.
A couple of weeks ago, however, Bruiser was brought over to meet us.  What a strange person he is!

He is like a little barrel with a curly tail and a squished up face.  He likes to swim, so his humans have provided him with a swimming pool. He lies in there on these hot summer days.  Am sorta jealous of that....I wonder if Santa might bring me a swimming pool?

Also he can skateboard.  This impresses me. I don't believe I am genetically suited to skateboarding because of my long legs. I think I would end up in a tangle but Bruiser just jumps on and off he goes....zoom.

He has one annoying habit, however; he likes to run under me.

I don't like it.

One minute I can see him and the next minute he is gone and then he pops up behind me.  Grrr!
All I can do is jump!  High!  Straight up! It's very annoying!

Heidi thinks it's hilarious. She runs around barking and that makes Bruiser all hyped up and then he starts zipping round, in and out and through my legs. Grr!

But, it seems he is family so what can one do?

Christmas is here again.

As you can see we are helping Mum make the house ready for Santa to come. There is a lot of shiny tinsel and lots of Christmas balls and, of course, the special tree.

Mum has delivered the annual Christmas lecture about the "Rules pertaining to Christmas Trees" complete with the associated by-laws which relate to parcels and dangly ornaments.
We paid strict attention to this lecture because we want Santa to know what good dogs we are. Last year we must have been amazingly good because at Christmas time we received an absolute bonanza of goodies.  I am still chewing on the remains of an enormous doggy candy cane that the Big Man brought for me.  I keep it out in the yard because Mum won't let me bring it in. She claims to be offended by its delicious aroma.

So, here we are being reindeer.  Heidi doesn't mind wearing the stupid glittery horns but I allowed myself to be photographed and then swiftly removed them. Dad suggested Mum put the glittery angel's halo on me but she said that would give the world a false impression of my personality. Huh? I don't understand that comment.

We have a tradition in our family that everyone has a Christmas ball with his or her name on it. They hang on tinsel near the stockings. This year we have added a new one for our new cousin, Bruiser.  He is a bulldog person who has a tendency to run underneath me causing me to perform my world famous vertical leap.  Dad says I am like an elephant with a mouse. I don't understand that comment either.

Anyway now the Christmas tree is standing in the corner of the lounge room looking beautiful (and out of bounds) and Mum has moved on to the family room with her decorations box.  Dad has decided it is time for lunch so, while he organises some food, which he will (hopefully) generously share with us, we are taking the opportunity to have a play.

Wednesday, 21 November 2012


Summertime where we live is hot and sticky and stormy.

We don't mind the hot days because have the machine on the wall that keeps us cool.  Mum says if we didn't have that machine, we would have to pack up and move to the cool side of the world every summer.
Hmm.  Could be interesting, I suppose.

Summertime is also when Christmas happens.  We like Christmas even though there are a lot of rules to be followed concerning Christmas trees and parcels. Christmas means lots of visitors and treats.  Christmas is a good thing.

But, the thing we don't like about summertime is the storms.....big, loud, flashing, crashing, scary storms.  Heidi just abandons everything and goes to hide.  Her preferred hiding spot is the walk in wardrobe in Mum's bedroom but Mum has become very quick in closing the door and diverting Heidi to the garage where our cubby crates are.

Over the weekend we had the biggest, loudest, flashiest, crashingest, scariest storms ever.  They started in the morning and went on and on and on.  At first there was just the thunder....boom, rumble, rumble, boom.  That was enough for HoHo.  She was off! She tucked her tail under and raced off down the hall towards Mum's bedroom.  However, in a brilliant piece of double-teaming, the humans foiled her plan. Dad appeared out of nowhere...well, actually, out of the bathroom....and slowed Heidi down, giving Mum time to get ahead of her and close the door.  Rats!  Plan B!  Zoom!  Off to the cubby.  Safe and sound, she stayed in there for the rest of the day, only emerging for dinner and an extremely quick bathroom break. So it was all up to me...again.

Now, in circumstances such as these, I feel it to be my duty to stay as close as possible to Mum and Dad to take care of them.  I think that if I sit on them or, at the very least, sit beside them, they are going to be safe through the storm. I am prepared to cuddle with them as long as it takes to make them feel secure.  You should feel the shuddering and shivering! Someone is very scared.
So, on Saturday, that's what I did. I sat with Dad for a while and then I sat with Mum for a while. If either of them moved I went with them.  There was no way they were going to be alone while those storms were crashing and flashing. Gee, I am a brave dog.  I did have to take a dinner break and a bathroom break (made Mum come out with me for that...with an umbrella) but I guarded them both for hours and hours.

And then....when the storms had moved away and everything had calmed down and Heidi had boldly gone out for the quickest bathroom visit on record, Mum and Dad decided it was time for everyone to go to bed.  So while Dad was in the bathroom, I thought it was only fair that I have some sort of trophy for my exceptional protective display.  I "borrowed" a pair of socks from the washing basket....(ha! they think they can hide things in there)...and took them to my cubby crate.  Tee hee.

Mum found them this morning.  She gave me "the look" that means I could be in trouble, but then she just said, "Oh, Trudy," and took them back to the washing basket.  I guess that means she's glad to have me here to take care of her.

Thursday, 1 November 2012

Home again.

Well, we have been back home now for several days and everything is back to normal.  We were extra specially good for a few days just to make sure we didn't get sent back to Kennel.  Not that Kennel is a bad just isn't home.  Home has Mum and Dad and schmackos and our cubby house beds and our toys and Otto the Rat next door and lots of normal smells that just aren't there at Kennel.  We are very relaxed and happy.

BUT......this morning a big box arrived with Post Office Man. It is in the hall. Mum hasn't opened it yet.  Heidi read the writing on it.  (Heidi is a very talented dog.).  It says DOG CRATE.  What the....?
What do we need a dog crate for?   We have our dog cubbies already. They are very comfortable and are great places to hide away when the nasty storms come round.  Mine is ever so slightly shredded in the front. You see, I got a bit frightened by a lightning storm and had to rip into something to release my fear......but it's still good....nothing that would warrant a DOG CRATE!!

Stand by for more information.  I am off to try to open that box.

Thursday, 11 October 2012


Once again we are prisoners at Kennel.  Miss Jeanette and Miss Angela are taking care of us and Mr Paul even popped in to give us our manners lesson but we are still prisoners in our 'family suite'.

Mum and Dad have disappeared off with their suitcases to somewhere called Ha Why Ee.

 I don't know when they are coming back to get us. I don't know why we can't go with them when they get the suitcases out. I don't know how they could possibly be happy to go anywhere without Heidi and me. I don't know why Miss Jeanette won't let us go into her house at night. I don't know why Joe the greyhound can run so fast when we are allowed to go into the play yard.  I don't know why Mr Paul thinks I am such a good dog when I come back the first time he calls me.  I don't know why Heidi refuses to do the 'Down' thing when Mr Paul tells her to.

It seems that although I am very wise on many issues there are a lot of things that I don't know.  Perhaps if I was allowed to go to Ha Why Ee I would learn some more things.  Must remember to mention this to Mum and Dad when they come back.

Prisoners Numbers  G1 and G2, (don't know what this means either), signing off for now. Woof!

Friday, 21 September 2012

Special Duty

Dad sat us down this morning and told us we were on special duty this weekend.

You see, he has gone away to Golf. He goes there most Sundays but this time he is going to Golf for three whole days.  This means that we have to take care of Mum. Dad said so.
"Trudy,' he said. 'I want you to look after your Mum for me.'

So Heidi and I are taking our duties very seriously.  Where Mum goes, we go.
This afternoon when there was some thunder, I made sure she was safe by sitting on her lap so that she felt safe.  I am sure she appreciated my efforts because she didn't try to push me off.

I tried to look after her while she was in the shower by sitting in the bathroom doorway but she said my attentions were not required. I shall report this to Dad when he comes home. How am I supposed to take care of her if she is going to be difficult about it? Heidi says that there is no accounting for the perverse natures of humans.  I think she may be correct.

Dinner was managed fairly easily. We were served at the appropriate time and then, Mum made herself some ravioli. We watched over her carefully while she ate it without sharing...some silly nonsense about tomato and garlic not being good for dogs.  Now we are enjoying tea and biscuits together.....well, she has the tea and we have had a biscuit each.

Heidi is trying to convince Mum that it would be best if we slept in the big bed with her tonight but Mum is resisting this offer. accounting for perversity.  This too shall be reported to Dad.

He called us earlier and Mum told him we were doing a good job....then she told him about the hole I found in the backyard that required digging, the tarpaulin that I found that needed ripping up, the old rubber thong that Heidi took into her nest behind the palm tree and a couple of other minor indiscretions that had occurred today.

All in all I think that we are carrying out our special duties extremely well. Dad will be really pleased with us.  I am expecting a nice big juicy bone on Sunday night when he comes home.

Sunday, 9 September 2012

The calm position

On Friday morning right after Schmackos we had a visitor. His name was Mr Paul.  We had never met him before but he came right into our house and sat down at the kitchen table.
Mum and Dad sat down too and they had a big talk with Mr Paul.
Heidi hid....of it was up to me to find out what was going on.  I went over to Mr Paul and put my head on his leg so that he would be impressed by my friendly nature and give me a pat. He did but he also put a lead on me.
Excellent! I thought. We're going for a walk.  
Heidi came running in because she wanted to go for a walk too but it was all a trick.  We weren't going for a walk at all.

It was something called TRAINING.  Mr Paul was here to teach us something called the controlled calm position.   It involves sitting.  Nothing else.....just sitting.  When Mr Paul or Mum pull up on one's collar, one is to sit......just sit....nothing else....just sit.  I picked it very quickly but Heidi decided that she would sit when she wanted to sit not when someone else wanted her to sit. There was, after all, no bowl of dinner involved. So she took a bit longer to understand the calm position.

Today we went to the park and practiced walking a bit and then sitting....nothing else....just sitting.
People kept coming over to Mum and asking her if we were okay.....she just standing there and me sitting....just sitting.  Boy, was I ever calm!  I even sat...just sat.....when a child on a bike wobbled past me.

Mum seems pleased that we can do this new trick.  We are puzzled.  Why would she want us to be calm?  Surely all the brilliant rampaging and frenzied barking and compulsive possum stalking are far preferable to sitting....nothing else.....just sitting in a calm manner?  All this calmness makes us quite sleepy.  Zzzzzzz

Friday, 24 August 2012

Public Announcement

A serious situation has been brought to our attention today.  It seems there has been an outbreak of bear-napping north of Brisbane.  Residents are warned that white coated humans have been creeping around intent on swiping guard bears, especially small ones from their positions atop metal stands in hospital rooms.  These attacks have been most brazen, some occurring right in front of the bears' owners.

This very morning in the Redcliffe hospital a small bear of noble birth, Sir Rascal, was almost abducted by one of theses white-coated villains.  Fortunately, the Lady Kristine of Narangba, although confined to her sick bed, was able to intercept the bear-napper and save the innocent bear.  It is suspected that Lady Kristine was deliberated sedated in order to render her helpless to assist Sir Rascal.  It is expected that in future security in the form of the intrepid Bonnie the Wonder Dog will be employed to safeguard both Lady Kristine and Sir R.

Heidi and I are appalled by this blatant disregard of bear rights.  What is the world coming to when a guard bear is unable to perform his duties without fear of bear- napping.
Bear-mappers beware! We are watching out for you.

Friday, 17 August 2012

Showering with Mum.

So today we found out what that cabinet in the bathroom is for.  It is a rain cabinet.  You go in there and it rains on you....warm rain.  Amazing!

How did we find this out? Well, I'll tell you.

It is a beautiful day here in Brisbane and so Heidi and I were out in the garden investigating. We like to investigate.  You can find all sorts of interesting things if you look hard enough.  We found the remains of something - possibly a choko (chayote for you non Australians) from the vine next door. We found several seed pods - none of which were edible. We found a hole that needed digging so we dug it. Then we found Otto the Rat watching us through the fence so we had to run up and down the fence line barking at him.  By the time Mum called us to come inside, I was no longer blonde...more a smokey grey colour. Heidi was still a brunette. You can't tell when she is dirty.

Mum took one look at us and had what can only be called a bad reaction. She locked us in the poolroom and left us there while she had a cup of tea. Dad said it was a calming cuppa.
Then she took me into the bathroom and invited me to get into the cabinet with her.  She was wearing a swimsuit so I was a bit confused. Usually when she has a swimsuit on it means she is going into the spa pool.  I tried to resist her invitation but that woman has a will of iron at times. She dragged me in, not an easy task, and closed the door. Then the rain started.

It was quite nice really. Mum rubbed shampoo on me and the rain washed it off.  After a while, the rain stopped and we came out. Mum wrapped me up in two towels and Dad took me back to the poolroom.  Then Heidi had a turn in the rain cabinet.  She managed to keep her head dry. How, I don't know.

Shortly after that, Mum brought the hair dryer to the poolroom and dried us off completely. I am a big blonde dog again and Heidi is still a brunette.  Mum seems to be happy that we are (all) nice and clean again.  She has some sort of preoccupation with keeping things clean. A waste of time in my opinion. They only get dirty again....especially dogs with dirt attracting coats. 

What an interesting afternoon.

P.S.  Dad filled the hole in so it will have to be dug again next time we are outside.

Monday, 13 August 2012

The deed that must not be named.

I have committed a major indiscretion it would seem.  I am not entirely sure why this so, because what I did seemed perfectly natural to me. Heidi agreed that it was the only thing to do under the circumstances. So I did it and, I have to say, I enjoyed it.

Mum and Dad, on the other paw, found my actions to be "completely unacceptable and inappropriate behaviour for a young lady of my breeding".

In fact, since the event actually took place, it has not been referred to name. It is like that guy in the Harry Potter books - He who must not be named.  This is the deed that must not be named. 

Suffice to say that it had to do with the little blighters who race around on the roof every night, hurl seeds and gum nuts around and yell abuse at innocent dogs. But, apparently, I am the one who has committed a crime and I am the one who is in considerable disgrace for the deed (that must not be named).

When news of the deed was relayed via text message (I am remarkably good at texting) even Mark and Eliza (usually two of my staunchest supporters) were horrified.  Dad immediately removed all evidence of the deed and even though I searched and searched I couldn't find any traces of the crime.

So here I sit, in disgrace, trying to work out what was so bad about what I did.

Perpetrator of the Deed.

Wednesday, 1 August 2012

Cold Weather Blues

It has been really cold these past few mornings. Heidi has commandeered the beanbag which has a nice soft velvet cover. This has meant that I have had to find a nice warm spot of my own.

Mum has been most unreasonable about sharing the big bed with me. I suggested we send Dad down to the spare room but, apparently, he takes precedence over me when it comes to sleeping companions. I do not understand this at all because he makes the most appalling noise when he sleeps, and I am nice and quiet.  

I went to the spare room but the door was closed. Then I remembered that there is a couch in the other bedroom. So that is where I have been sleeping.  It isn't as soft as the big bed but it is warm enough for me.  I have also discovered that after dinner, when Mum and Dad settle down to watch the television, nobody takes much notice of me. This, therefore, is a good time to sneak down to the big bed and snooze in comfort for a couple of hours. 

Tomorrow we are expecting some extra treats because it is Heidi's birthday. She'll be six. Usually we have bones or chewy treats to celebrate. I am not sure what we will get tomorrow because Mum was somewhat displeased with us for digging holes in the backyard. She said, 'That's it, Heidi. Your birthday is cancelled.'.  But, surely, she can't cancel a birthday.  There must be a rule in the dog owner's handbook about such things.  I wonder where Mum keeps her copy of the dog owner's handbook.  I might have to study the section on protests and appeals.

Happy Birthday, Heidi.  

Saturday, 14 July 2012

New World Record

Ho Ho and I have just been informed by Mum that we have achieved a new record for production of 'little gifts' left on the lawn each day.  Apparently production is up by a considerable amount.
We are always pleased to be responsible for something worthy of praise, given that we so often seem to be in disgrace, but we feel, on this occasion that some of the credit must go to Mum and Dad. After all, if it were not for the quality and quantity of the yummy food we are served, production could not have reached reach the levels it has.

Having accompanied Mum on her patrol around the backyard today, it is my opinion that our production isn't really any more than usual. Methinks that Mum has been slack in her collection efforts because of the recent spate of rainy days.

Incidentally, I have yet to figure out what it is that motivates our humans to be so diligent in gathering up all these 'little gifts'.  Mum puts them all into a plastic bag, wearing rubber gloves while she does so, (probably doesn't want to damage them), and then takes the bag somewhere. I don't know where she takes them but the collection must be pretty big by now.  We are nearly six years old. That's a lot of collecting and a lot of 'little gifts'.

It is a puzzlement to me.

Tuesday, 10 July 2012

Good news

We have just been informed that our good friend, Bonnie the Wonder Dog, is feeling much better after her recent trip to the doctor. She has not been 100% for a long time and so we are hoping that this time she will really be on the road to recovery. Excellent effort Bonzo and we also hope that your Mum has calmed down and stopped being a sook. Wags. Trudy and HoHo

Friday, 6 July 2012

Why there is no room in the bed for Mum.

On these cold morning, when Mum gets up to make a cup of tea, I feel it to be my duty to keep her spot warm for her.

The problem arises when Mum returns with the tea and I don't want to get off because I am sooooo comfortable.

Surely she could squeeze in somewhere here.
Don't make me leave, Mum.

Thursday, 28 June 2012

On Trial

The Evidence Exhibit 1

The Evidence Exhibit 2

The Suspect

In the Witness Box

The Testimony

It was cold.  Dad had left them on the floor.  I found them.  My paws were cold. I was going to figure out how to put them on later.

The Verdict

Guilty as charged.  

Wednesday, 27 June 2012


It is cold.  It is very cold.  We had a clip last week so we don't even have a full woolly coat to help keep us warm.  Miss Anna didn't clip us as closely as she does in summer but even's cold.

I have retreated to my beanbag because it covered in a nice soft velvety material which is easy to snuggle in.

This was actually my third choice of cuddle up venue but, apparently, even really cold days do not change certain regulations within our household.

Earlier today I left Heidi curled in a tight, tight, ball on the couch and took myself down the hall to Mum and Dad's bed.  They have a big bed with a nice warm quilt on it.  If a passing dog accidentally nudges it slightly, it slips a bit in a floor ward direction.  If the passing dog repeats the nudging several times, the quilt comes right down onto the floor where the passing dog can curl up and snooze in supreme warmth and comfort.
Unfortunately this passing dog's mother decided to change the towels in the ensuite bathroom, removed me from my snuggled position and closed the bedroom door so as to block any further passing.

I ventured by chance into the spare room where there is another big bed with a doona on it.  Doonas are  lovely to snuggle on, especially if one has one's favourite toy with one.  I jumped and snuggled.....for a while .....until Mum decided to vacuum the house and, once again, a door was closed.

So I went out into the family room where my bean bag is and lay on it looking really depressed.  Mum and Heidi were in the is warmer in there because the floor has carpet.......and I was in the family room on my beanbag.   Sigh.

But, then, Mum came and picked up my beanbag and carried it out into the lounge.  She put it right beside her chair.  So now I am cuddled up in my brown, velvety beanbag right next to Mum.  It is still cold outside but I feel better now.   Zzzzzzz.

Friday, 22 June 2012


We got into trouble again today.  I guess there's nothing unusual in that.  We get into trouble quite often surprisingly.

Here's what happened.  Heidi and I were having a play out in the big side of the yard where Mum keeps all her plants and the umbrella and the table and chairs and stuff.  It was really fun.  We were racing around, doing laps around the Murraya tree and having a good bark at anyone who dared to come too close to our house.  Then Heidi found an interesting smell amongst the pot plants.  She said a cane toad was hiding in there somewhere.  So we devised a plan.

The plan was that we would take all the plants out of their pots so that we would be able to see where the toad was.  Good idea!  We started with the bromeliads because they just sort of sit in their pots and don't have any dirt to dig up.  We took them all out and tossed them out onto the grass...only broke a few...and then dragged the pots over to the grass as well.

We had just started to dig out the big spiky thing that Mum calls a Yucca when a man stuck his head up over the gate and shouted at us.
"Naughty dogs!  What are you doing?  Your Mum will be cross when she sees all her plants ripped up!"
It was the man who takes away the garden rubbish bag.  Usually we hear him coming but we must have been too busy with the pots plants to hear him this time.  We got such a fright!  If we had been wearing pants, we would have pooped them!  How dare he sneak up on us like that?

We gave him a jolly good barking which, as it happened, might not have been a good idea because Mum heard all the noise and came outside to see what we were up to. 
Well, like I said, we got into trouble...again. Mum was not happy with us.  We tried to tell her about the toad but she didn't care. We were banished to the garage and the back yard in disgrace for the afternoon. 

When Dad came home, he sat us down and gave us a talking to.  We listened but it didn't make sense to us.  How were we supposed to find the toad without taking the plants out?  No mention was made of the bag man spying on us and scaring five years growth off us.  Sometimes these humans are all just a bit too confusing for me........and if a highly intelligent dog like me is confused, how are the ordinary dogs suppused to cope?

Monday, 11 June 2012

Assault Insult

On Thursday we went to the puppy park.   Yay!  We love it there.  We love to race around, working off excess energy and go sniffing to see who else has been there.  Sometimes we meet other dogs there too.
When we arrived this time we hurried straight down to the large enclosure first, dragging Mum along because she walks too slowly for us sometimes.  There were several large puddles in the big space so Mum said we would go to the little enclosure instead.  We saw there were already two dogs in there so we had to have a greeting sniff at the gate before we could go in.  Angel, the Spoodle and Dudley, a dog of uncertain heritage, welcomed us in and we were soon racing around berserkly together. 

I had brought my sooper dooper red bouncy ball, my favourite toy.  Mum threw it for me so that I could practise jumping up to try to catch it.  Dudley thought he could pick it up too.  I told him his mouth was too little but he kept trying anyway.  Then he started playing soccer with MY sooper dooper red bouncy ball.  How rude!!   I was just about to take my ball when a most outrageous thing happened.  Dudley of the uncertain heritage decided he wanted to dance with me...or something.....he tried to jump up from behind me to do the conga....or something.....but he couldn't reach.  So he came around to the side and put his front paws on my back and started doing his dance.....the limbo....or something.  I was horrified!!  I don't like boy dogs at the best of times.  They smell funny and I definitely didn't want to dance with Dudley. 

I looked around for Mum but she was laughing about something with Dudley's Mum.  No help at all!   Dudley was still doing the limbo....or something....up against my I knocked his legs out from under him, picked up my sooper dooper red bouncy ball and headed for the gate.
I sat there wondering about the propensity of boy dogs to try to steal sooper dooper bouncy balls or to launch into dance manoeuvres at any moment.  Mum came over to give me a cuddle and Heidi set about chasing Dancing Dudley around the enclosure and performing her world famous judo flips on him. 

I finally calmed down and had a lovely time playing with Angel the Spoodle but I refused to have any further contact with Dudley, his uncertain heritage or his dance moves. 
I still don't like boy dogs. 

Tuesday, 22 May 2012

A Battle of Wills

Mum has bought us bones. This is because our doctor has said that we should eat bones each week to keep our teeth clean. Heidi is outside chomping away at her big piece of dinosaur bone. She will work at it for hours until it is just a tiny nub which Mum will then throw in the bin. I had my bone in the garage and had a bit of a chew at it and then I thought I would take it out to the palm tree and bury it in my secret spot. Mum did not agree with my plan however. She took my bone and put it....and the pool room and told me to 'Eat that bone'. I have sucked it and had a bit more of a chew on it but I really want to go and bury it. Mum says that if I bury it I will become 'territorial' and will not let Heidi out into the back yard. This is true. It is my bone and, even if I don't want it, nobody else can have it or even come near it. So here I sit.....with my bone....waiting....wanting to bury it.....and Mum is having a coffee in the kitchen.....watching me....every so often telling me to eat the bone. Heidi is crunching outside. I can hear bone shattering noises coming from the patio. Maybe I will just have another chew. That might make Mum let me take it out to bury. Not bad! Still want to bury it though. Mum is watching me. I smile and wag my tail. No result. Still in the pool room with my bone. It is a battle of wills. No one is going to make me eat a bone if I want to bury it first. I like my bones slightly rancid and mouldy. 45 minutes later: Still in the pool room with my bone....although there doesn't seem to be much of it left now. The more I chewed at it the better it tasted so I kept on chewing and!....I reached the soft, sweet marrow in the middle and I just couldn't stop. Yummmmm! The problem now is that Mum will think she has won and....seriously, we cannot have humans thinking that they are in control. So I am going to bury this little bit that I have left under the cushions of the chair. Ha! The big blonde dog is victorious....again!

Friday, 18 May 2012

Footnote from Mum

As a footnote to the last post I must tell you all that Trudy is in deep disgrace tonight because, as I was unloading and putting away the groceries this afternoon, she managed to make off with a freshly baked loaf (a whole loaf!!!!) of wholemeal bread and had devoured it before I realised it was gone.  Took it straight out of the shopping bag.  I couldn't believe it.
Its not as thought I starve the dog, folks.  She is very well fed....but it seems she now has a taste for fresh bread......buttered or not.....with or without cheese.
In anticipation of the digestive uproar I am sure will ensue, I have relegated the big blonde dog to the garage.

Best Regards
BBD's Mum.

Wednesday, 16 May 2012

White or Wholemeal?

On Sunday the humans celebrated Mothers' Day which meant that we were left at home by ourselves.....again! Mum fed us first and then Dad said to me, "Troods, you guard the house." Well, I take my duties as a guard dog very seriously so I started patrolling the house to make sure there were no intruders. Heidi went for an after dinner nap on the couch. I kept guarding. I sat out in the pool room and watched out through the windows. Heidi woke up and had a drink. I kept guarding. Heidi went out the back for....well, you can guess what she went for. I kept patrolling. Gosh, I was doing a good job! Heidi decided nothing was happening so she went back to sleep on the couch. I may have had a short snooze but I was still on high alert. Nothing got past me. No guard dog has ever done a better job than me. All that guarding was making me hungry. Heidi said that there wouldn't be any more food until Mum came home but I was really feeling like a little snack......but I was a guard dog so I kept patrolling. And then....I saw something.....up on the bench. Dad had left something there. He must have known that a great guard dog like me would need a snack halfway through her shift. Good one, Dad! I stood up and took it down. It was wrapped up in a plastic bag and it was a bit of a struggle to get it open but, eventually, I was able to enjoy my snack of sliced bread. It would have nicer if Dad had buttered it but it's the thought that counts, after all. I kept guarding until Mum and Dad came home, but I must confess that I (OMG!!!)....quite a bit. Nobody mentioned that the bread was gone but there were several complaints about 'smelly dogs'. I tried to look innocent because it is usually Heidi who is to blame for these things. It wasn't until the next morning that Mum found the plastic bag outside where I had left it. Apparently the bread wasn't meant for me at all...which explains why it wasn't buttered,I suppose. Mum was not impressed with how many 'little gifts' I had left for her in the back yard either. Judging by the way she goes around collecting them every day I thought she would have been impressed with the quantity, From this I have learned that Wholemeal bread gives me a tummy ache and so, in future, I will be sticking to white bread.....hopefully buttered...and preferably with cheese.....but, gee, I was a great guard dog.

Sunday, 6 May 2012

Home Again...Hooray!

Mum came to get us at last!
Miss Angela is fun and we have a pretty good time staying with her but we are always very glad to come home.

As soon as Mum unloaded us from the car, we raced around to make sure everything was just where we left it.  All seemed to be okay so we gave the neighbours a good barking just to let them know we were back and to warn Otto (aka The Rat) to keep his ratty face away from our fence.
Dad was somewhat put out that we didn't greet him until we had taken care of these things.  Priorities, we tried to tell him....priorities!  You cannot allow the neighbours to think they can just carry on as they please.  It is all for the security of the house that we have to be so firm with the likes of pussy cats, possums and Rats who think they are dogs.  Heidi sat beside Dad on the couch for a while so that he felt appreciated.  (Got to keep the humans happy.)

Now, dinner has been served (on time) by Mum and we are having a well-deserved rest.  Being 'on holidays' sure does wear a dog out.

Our 'family suite' was quite comfortable but there is nothing quite like a snooze on your very own chair or couch.

Saturday, 5 May 2012

Help! We Are Prisoners!

We are being held prisoner by Miss Angela at the kennel. Mum dropped us off last week....ages ago...and I think she has forgotten to come and pick us up again. There doesn't seem to be any way for us to get out of here and go home on our own. Heidi says if we could get out, she knows the way back to our house. I think between the two of us we'd find the way. How hard could it be? The problem is that Miss Angela has these big high fences everywhere....and gates which close by themselves. Heidi and I have a "family suite" so we can be together. It has a sleeping space with two beds which is covered in and another space which is more open and allows us to see our fellow Basil. Basil is another dog who is trapped here. He has little tiny legs and a long body.....obviously some strange mutant breed. He has a tendency to wail when he feels lonely. Heidi talks to him through the fence and she says he dribbles too. He doesn't get to play with us because Miss Angela says we are too Boisterous for him. I don't know what boisterous is but I think it must be something to do with his having those little stumpy legs and not being able to run and jump like us. Miss Angela can be bossy but she does serve dinner at the right time....5 pm...however, there are no breakfast treats. I have tried to speak with her on this issue but she just doesn't seem to understand. Heidi says no breakfast treats is totally unacceptable. Even prisoners should have treats, she says. Otherwise Miss Angela seems to have a reasonable grip on what dogs like. She knows lots of good games and has even built a running track and mud puddles in the playground. We like the running track. There is a big square playing yard and the running track goes around the outside of it. Miss Angela puts Joe, the greyhound, in the running track and we go in the middle yard. Joe belts around the running track and we rush from side to side of the playing yard to keep up with him. Boy, is he fast! Heidi says she is the winner because she can go across and back before Joe can go right around. Methinks Heidi deludes herself. I try to keep up with Joe and he beats me every time probably because I am barking as I go. Miss Angela says I am a lunatic. Don't know what that means either. I have worked out that when the bell rings, it means there is someone at the front gate. Sometimes it is a new prisoner being dropped off and sometimes it is someone's human coming to get them. Maybe, tomorrow the bell will ring and it will be Mum coming for us......but,I guess, if you have to be a prisoner this isn't a bad place to be.

Sunday, 22 April 2012

Victory is ours!

Update on our earlier story about the pussy cats next door.

Today we learned that the lady in that house has sent the pussycats to live somewhere else. Mum says it happened because the man that owns the house doesn't let the tenants have pets but we know it was our brilliant efforts to rid the neighbourhood of felines that have caused this.
Victory is ours!!!!

Now we just have to work out what to do about the vicious, scratching, biting, ferocious tiger that lives in the bushes out the back.

Monday, 9 April 2012

Mouse trap

In the middle of the night I woke up, climbed down from the nice comfy bed in the spare (Mum forgot to close the door again..haha), and wandered through the house to see what I could see. And what did I see? A mouse!
It ran across the family room and disappeared. I am not a very good mouse catcher because I have big paws and, no matter how hard I try, the stupid little things run around underneath me and get away. I don't like things running under me. It makes me jump. So I went into the walk in cupboard and woke Heidi up.
Heidi is a most excellent mouser. She likes to catch little field mice and carry them around in her mouth. She has worked out that it is best to leave the tail hanging out because if you hold them with the tail inside your mouth it makes you cough and then they get away.
Heidi came out to the family room and soon sussed out where the mouse was.
It was hiding in Mum's office so we blocked off the doorways, pretended to be asleep and waited for it to come out.
When it tried to run out into the hallway we pounced and I got him......accidentally.....with my big paw. Squished him a bit, I did. He didn't want to run any more so Heidi said to leave him in the doorway as a present for Mum. Then we went back to sleep.
In the morning Dad found our present and didn't even show it to Mum. He took it straight outside. We were confused by that.....but he did give us treats afterwards so he must have appreciated our gift.

Friday, 23 March 2012

When is a rat not a rat?

Behind the back fence there is a rat. Mum says it is a dog but I don't think so. I think it is a rat.
It has little stumpy a rat.
It has little beady a rat.
It has a ratty looking a rat.
It makes a sucky a rat.
It is called Otto.....a rat's name if ever I heard one.

Despite all the evidence to the contrary, Mum insists it is a dog. She says it is a Chee-wow-wah. I have never heard of a Che-wow-wah. Neither has Heidi. So we have been keeping a close eye on Otto the Rat just to see if he shows any signs of dogginess.

We are taking turns at watching. There are spaces between the palings of the back fence. It is not like the side fence which is really high. This makes the watching quite easy and comfortable. We can just sit in under the palm trees and relax whilst peeping through the gaps in the fence. The only problem is that these particular palm trees are right beside the clump of bushes where we think the vicious, nasty, scratching, biting tiger beast lives.

We have come up with a plan to deal with this issue. One of us takes up the observation position under the palm trees and the other reclines gracefully on the patio lounger and listens for rustling in the bushes. That vicious, scratching, biting, nasty tiger beast is not going to get us again. In fact, now that I think about it, if anyone is danger from a nasty, vicious, scratching, biting tiger beast, it would be Otto the Rat.

He is little and tends to a rat.
He hides behind the big plant a rat.
He is teeny tiny and has no muscles to fight off a a rat.
He has, so far, shown no signs of being a dog so I think the tiger beast who lives in the bushes will have no problems turning Otto the Rat into a light lunch.

I hope not. I like spying on him. I like giving him a good barking occasionally and I like running up and down beside the fence racing him. He can go surprisingly fast sometimes. In fact, he's not so bad really.....better than those pussy cats.
Perhaps I should warn him about the vicious, biting, nasty, scratching tiger beast.

Monday, 19 March 2012

Goldidog and the Three Beds

It was raining in the forest by the lake.  Goldidog looked out of the garage doorway.  She had had a busy evening scaring away pussycats and climbing up the fence trying to catch pesky possums but, now, everything was quiet. Mum and Dad had gone to bed.  Heidi was in the walk in closet fast asleep and, now, it was raining.  Goldidog decided it was time for her to go to bed too.

She tried the bed in the garage.
It was too cramped and draughty. 
Goldidog kept looking.

She tried the beanbag by the poolroom door.   It was too soft and scrunchy.  Goldidog kept looking.

She wandered around the house looking for just the right spot to sleep. 
She had been a busy dog and she needed a comfortable place to rest.
And then, there it was.....the perfect place!  The big bed in the spare room where Mum slept on nights when Dad snored really loudly.  It was perfect!  Soft, but not too soft. Cool but not draughty and so, so comfortable.  Goldidog hopped up and arranged herself in the middle of the bed....ahhhh, just right.
Goldidog slept soundly and woke up as soon as the first birds started to sing.  She crept quietly out of the spare room and curled up in the little bed in the garage.  She was very pleased with herself.  She had found the perfect place to sleep and no one would ever know.

Or would they?

Saturday, 10 March 2012

I Tawt I Taw a Puddy Tat

Remember how I told you that we had a new pussy cat in our neighbourhood?  Well, there is not just one pussy cat but TWO!  
Heidi thought she heard something next door so she had a quick peep and was instantly on alert. There were two not just one.  She watched them for a while in their courtyard.

Then she called me to have a look too.  I had to peep in between the retaining wall and the fence palings to get a proper look but...yep...there they were.....lying on chairs looking very relaxed.
We gave them a good barking but it didn't worry them at all. 

Heidi and I had a council of war and decided that I would jump up really high and maybe get over the fence.  
So I tried but it didn't work.  Pfft!  Will have to come up with a better plan.

Meanwhile they are just laughing at us through the fence.  How rude!  
Pussy cats!  Phooey!!

Monday, 5 March 2012

An Interloper

Our new next door neighbours have committed the dreadful crime of buying.......a cat.  Can you believe it?
We are already having to put up with Kahlua, a brown feline being, who lives in one of the houses over the back fence and now we have another cat to deal with.

Cats are annoying beasties because they think they are cleverer than dogs.  This theory of theirs is based on the fact that they can walk along the tops of fences and we cannot. They like to do this whilst saying rude things like, 'Ha ha, stupid dog. You can't get me.'  This is very irritating and insulting.  Kahlua is an expert in irritating Heidi and me.  He even sits on the top of the fence and dangles his tail as he sings his silly pussy cat songs.  When I jump up to grab him, he flips his tail out of the way.  Why I could just.........!!!

Anyway, I was sitting in the pool room on Sunday, keeping an eye on the park across the road, when this new cat brazenly wandered past the window.  Well, I gave hime a jolly good barking and he ran away and sat right outside the garden gate.   I kept barking and Heidi came to help but the dastardly thing just sat there with its tongue sticking out.  Eventually Dad had to go out and shoo it off.  I was beside myself with indignation and it was only the fact that dinner was soon to be served that calmed me down.

Then, yesterday, I was out in the yard doing my regular patrol when I saw, under our palm trees, an interloper.  You guessed it.  It was the new cat.  How dare he?  I let out a blood curdling (according to Mum) squeal and dived in there after him.  He started spitting and squealing too and shot into the bushes.  I went in after him and was crashing around looking for him when Mum arrived on the scene demanding to know what was going on.

The cat used this diversion to zoom off towards the garage but Heidi was waiting there to block his exit,
(excellent double teaming by the brave canine defenders of the home), so there was more spitting and squealing.  Heidi had him cornered in the garage and I was on my way to assist when.......go on, have a guess what happened........yes, Mum ruined everything.   Sigh!

Mum slammed the garage door so I was stuck out in the yard.  Then she went over to try to grab Heidi which gave the cat a chance to nip in under the car.  Mum finally got hold of Heidi's collar and dragged her into the house and closed her in there.  Then she opened the big roller door and let the cat out.

Game over.

Heidi and I spent about an hour looking around the yard and the garage just in case the cat had come back without any success.  Mum says she hopes he has learned his lesson and won't come back into our place.
Having ruined our game she doesn't want us to have any more fun.  Humans!   As previously mentioned on this blog, humans have no idea about having fun.

Cats!!  Bah!!

Saturday, 3 March 2012

Doctor's Orders

On Friday Mum put my leash on and opened the back of the car.  I thought we were going to the puppy park so I was very excited but then I noticed that Mum was putting Heidi back into the house and closing her in. 
Oh No!!  I was going to the vet!!!  Eek!! 
It's not that I don't like Doctor Sandra but she has a habit of doing funny things to me. 

As usual, when we arrived, I had to sit on the black thing for a minute.  Miss Hannah, the nurse, said I was 26 kg.  Apparently that is a good thing because Miss Hannah patted me and told me I was beautiful.  

Then we had to wait for a little while and I was a bit worried and a bit excited.  I was shivering so Miss Hannah came to cuddle me and told me I was soooo beautiful and that I didn't need to worry.
That was all very well for her to say; she wasn't the one who had to go in to see Doctor Sandra.  

Soon it was my turn and Doctor Sandra came out and said, 'Come on, Trudy.'  So in we went.
Well, it was pretty much what I had expected.  First I gave Doctor Sandra a big cuddle because I hadn't seen her for a long time.   She told me how beautiful I was and then I had to stand very quietly while she put the cold thing on my chest.  Then she had a good feel around my tummy and peered down my ears.  And then.......oh, the horror, the indignity,......she pulled up my tail and inserted......yes, inserted......something!!  How rude!!  I tried to sit down but Doctor Sandra had a firm hold on my tail so I couldn't.  At last she took the thing out of my.....well, you know.....and told me I was a good girl.  I was still feeling all insulted over the appalling assault on my person when things took a turn for the better.
I was given liver treats for being so well behaved and then Doctor Sandra told Mum I had a bit of 
'Tar - Tar' on my teeth and that I needed to eat bones more often.  Mum said that we have a bone once a week and Doctor Sandra said to make it twice a week or even more.  Yay!!!

After more cuddles we went home to Heidi who had done the only sensible thing given the circumstances.  She had hopped up on Mum's bed and gone to sleep.

I was exhausted.  What an effort!  Thank Goodness it only happens once a year.

Anyway, here I am following doctor's orders with some marrow bones that the butcher sliced up for us.

Mum gets the butcher to cut the bones up because if we have them when they are still big dinosaur bones we fight over them. 

Wednesday, 29 February 2012

Spa Day

Today we spent the morning with Miss Anna at the Doggie Spa.  It is one of our favourite things to do.  Mum takes us in at 9 o'clock and picks us up at about 1 o'clock.
I don't know what she does in between but we have a great time.
First we have a bath.  Not just any bath but a bath with rosemary scented bubbles to help relax us.  I usually go first and Heidi watches and laughs at me and then I have to stand in front of a huge fan and blow dry while Heidi has her bath.

Then there is the brushing and clipping.  We were very woolly today.  Miss Anna said she cut off enough wool to stuff a dozen cushions.  There was a bit of drama when Miss Anna found a grass seed trying to burrow into my belly.  Yuk!  She had to pop it out and disinfect my tummy.  Disinfectant doesn't taste very nice when you lick it.  Mum has put some paw paw ointment on now which is much nicer to lick.

I got to lie on the 'waiting couch' while Heidi had her ears plucked.  Ouch!  Ho Ho is so brave.  I guess she is used to it.  Heidi's wool is curly and she grows  some back inside her ears so they have to be plucked or she will get ear infections. 

To finish off, if we have been well behaved, we have a little treat.  Miss Anna lets us snooze on the 'waiting couch' while we wait for Mum to come to pick us up.  Sometimes we are allowed to play with Miss Anna's little dog but that didn't happen today because of a slight accident.

When we arrived at 9 o'clock, Miss Anna's dog was so excited to see us that she ran around in circles in the back yard and slipped into the fish pond.  She was covered in smelly green weeds (fish like weeds in their ponds) and Miss Anna said she was not a good advertisement for the spa and put her in the laundry.  So no play time just snooze time.

Now we look like a pair of skinny minnies but we feel a lot cooler. 
Thank you, Miss Anna.  See you in April. 

Thursday, 23 February 2012

Stupid rain!

Stupid rain!  We are over it.....totally over it. 
No going for a nice long walk; just a quick wander in the park.  No playing outside in amongst the palm trees or sneaking under the hedge for a good bark at Otto, (aka The Rat), who lives next door. 
Everytime I do go outside for a minute, I have to have my feet wiped before I can come back inside.
I even got into trpuble for having mud in my ears this morning.  Well, how else was I supposed to fix an itchy ear?  You rub your head on the grass....everybody knows that!  It woasn't my fault that the grass was a bit muddy at the time.  Over it!!  Totally over it!!

Heidi has gone on strike and retired to the cupboard, only emerging if she hears the pantry door opening.
I am lying on the bed in the pool room looking out at the park.  No people to bark at.  No dogs to bark at. No birds sitting on the fence to bark at.  It seems that even stupid cats stay in when it is raining. Sigh.......What is a dog supposed to do? 

On the upside, there is a nice soft spot forming in the middle of the lawn which, if this rain keeps going for a couple of days, might turn into a puddly sort of slip and slide for us.  Hmmm.  Note to self: keep an eye on that soft spot.  Hope Mum hasn't noticed it.  She won't let us go out there if she knows it is there.
No idea of fun, these humans.  What could be better than taking a run up and sliding along on your belly through the soft squelchy grass until you hit the bushes under the white flowery tree?  Sheer bliss! 
Oh well, I might just have a snooze until Heidi comes out to tell Mum that it is time for dinner to be served.  By then the slip and slide might be ready.

Thursday, 9 February 2012

Training Dad

This year Mum has been going out on some afternoons to help some kids with their school work. That means that she is not at home when it is dinner time.
Big problem! She is not at home and we cannot open matter how much some of us have tried. She is not at home so someone else has to be put in charge of feeding us....and the only available someone is...Dad.
This is not as straightforward as it might seem. Dad is not used to doing the dinner service so he does not automatically spring into action at 5.30 like Mum does. He seems to think that watching 'Deal or No Deal' on television takes precedence over our nutritional demands.
Therefore, a training program has been devised by Heidi to sort the problem out.
At 4.45 I go to Dad with the pulling toy and encourage him to play with us. He does.
At 5.00 Heidi goes to Dad and requests a neck rub. He rubs.
At 5.15 I go to Dad and put my head on his knee and gaze soulfully at him so that he can feel my starvation. He tells me I am a good girl.
At 5.30 Heidi goes to sit at Dad's feet using her very best and most perfect begging pose. He says how pretty she is and usually asks her if she is hungry. (Duh!!)
And then, if he doesn't get up and start serving.....I jump up onto the recliner chair with him and lie all over him so that he finally gets the message.
Yesterday, We only had to work through steps 1,2 and 3. Dinner was served at 5.20.
Another successful plan! Gosh, we're good.

And on a completely different subject.....

Freshly mown grass + rolling big blonde dog = big green dog! Fancy that!

Wednesday, 8 February 2012

Big scary storms

We are not in favor of big scary storms. A bit of rain occasionally is okay but we definitely do not like the loud crashing storms that make the yard into a swimming pool.
Now, you would think that a pool in the backyard would be a good thing but, according to Mum, it is not. She dashes around making sure all the drains are draining and checking doors and windows for leakage and, of course, keeping us inside. Today the swimming pool came right up to the doorway and Mum wasn't very happy about it.
Heidi was in the walk-in cupboard so it was up to me to follow Mum around and keep her out of trouble. She was out in the rain (I wasn't allowed out!!!) taking sticks and grass out of the drain and complaining about her hair getting wet. When I barked a suggestion that I come out to help, I was told, quite rudely I thought, to 'Shut up!'.
So now, some hours later, we are not allowed out because of the wet yard. The swimming pool has pretty much gone away but it is still slushy underpaw. The rule in these circumstances is as follows:- When one goes outside and gets wet paws, one is then denied further access to the house until said paws are dry. So one finds oneself confined to the garage or the pool room.
Our friend Bonnie's Mum says that there should be gumboots for adventurous dogs.
Hmm....Heidi would wear them. I am guessing that Bonnie would wear them too. Well, not me!!!
I would have those things off my paws pronto! I am no soft wussy princess! I am a big brave tiger hunting dog. A bit of water doesn't worry me. I thought I would go out and check the palm trees for pussy cats and possums. That's why I am waiting in the garage for my paws to dry.
Humans and their understanding of the necessities of a dog's life sometimes.
Oh well, if I'm not allowed in the house, I'd just as well go and see how much of that swimming pool is left. Woof!

Tuesday, 31 January 2012


 We had visitors on Saturday.  Our other humans, Mark and Eliza, came over to see us.....and Mum and Dad too, I suppose.
Anyway, we had a great time with our visitors.
Firstly we gave them a terrific (about Level 4) welcome because we hadn't seen them for a while and we figured that they would have brought treats with them.  There was jumping and squeaking and wagging and slurping which made them feel really appreciated and in the mood to distribute the treats.
We scored chompy chews so the welcoming effort was worthwhile.

Then, the humans all settled down to eat scones with jam and cream so we waited and waited and waited (patiently) until they noticed us again.  We were sitting so beautifully that we scored half a scone each.....but no jam and no cream.  Pfft!!

After that, we played fetch and pull games with our toys.  Mark is good at these games.  We have taught him well.  Even Heidi played fetch which is normally beneath her dignity......and then.....Mum brought out our most favouritest, bestest, most terrificest toy........our squeaky lizard.   He usually lives in the top cupboard in the kitchen and we hardly ever get to play with him because I have tendency to try to rip his tail off.   Mark played with us for a long time with the lizard and our other toys.  It was great.  We didn't have time to play wrestling with Mark because the humans had to go to catch a bus.  I don't know if buses are hard to catch but Mark and Eliza seem to try to catch one regularly.  Ah well...we really enjoyed the visit and Heidi said it was just as well they left because it was time for Mum to serve our dinner.

After dinner we just had to have a bit of a snooze because visitors are really hard work. 
I am dreaming about that squeaky lizard and trying to figure out a way to get him out of his cupboard.
Heidi is curled up on the chair and Mum and Dad are being quiet so that we can sleep.  Zzzzzzzzz.

Wednesday, 25 January 2012


Heidi has done it!  She slept almost all night on the big bed beside Dad. 
Mum and Dad went to bed last night as usual and, as usual as part of Operation Doona, Heidi went into the walk-in cupboard.  I curled up on the mat near the patio doors because someone has to keep an eye out for pussycats.  All was quiet for a while but then Dad started to snore.  Now, when our Dad snores, he is really loud so Mum sometimes goes into the spare room to sleep and that is what happened last night.  
Mum wandered off down the  hall and left Dad by himself in the bed.  Heidi saw her chance and hopped up beside him.  He didn't even know that Mum had gone because there was a warm body beside him.  Ha ha.....wags and wuffs.  Operation Doona was a complete success!
Heidi and Dad snored together in the big bed until 6 a.m. when Mum got up to go to the bathroom and unceremoniously ejected a triumphant HoHo from the bedroom.
Heidi didn't care.  She was victorious.  She has not stopped bragging about it since and is now resting on the couch planning her next campaign.

Sadly there is no picture of Dad and Heidi snoring together because Dad would not approve the photographic evidence, but here is the co-ordinator of Operation Doona enjoying her success.

Tuesday, 24 January 2012

Rain, rain, rain.

We don't like rain. 
We do like the puddles it creates....but we don't like rain. 
It has been raining and raining and raining at our place.  It makes a lot of noise on the roof of the pool room which frightens Heidi, but not me, of course.  It means we don't get to go out for a walk or to the puppy park.  Pfft!!!
Even going out for a pee is a problem.  Usually a rainy day just means we have to be quick when popping outside for a pee and, if you stay under the eaves of the house, you can stay dry.  Mum puts towels near the garage door for us to wipe our feet on when we come back in.  Heidi is good at that but I have big feet and it is hard to get them dry so Mum has to help me sometimes.
Last night the water outside was so deep that it wasn't just our feet getting wet.  Assuming the necessary position meant that our bottoms were in the water too.  Mum accepted Heidi's formal protest about the appalling conditions and put some newspapers down in the back corner of the garage for us to use in case of emergency. 
I was tempted to go for a bit of a roll out near the palm trees this morning but Mum said if I did I wouldn't be allowed back in the house.  
Thought about it.  Considered my options carefully.  Decided to rip up some cardboards boxes instead. 
We are waiting for Mum to take us out for a quick walk.  It hasn't rained for a while so we think we should be able to go but Mum doesn't seem too keen.  Heidi has gone out strike and is picketing the lounge room with a puller toy in her mouth.  I am displaying my great watch-dog abilities by fending off (from a distance through the screen door) a group of magpies who are digging things out of the front lawn.  Surely Mum will relent and take us out. 
We don't like rain.  

Saturday, 21 January 2012

Heidi's New Year's Resolution

Heidi has decided that sleeping on the floor, or on the couch, or even in our beds in the garage is not good enough for her anymore. 

She has decided that as a VIP,  (very important pet), she is entitled to a far more comfortable arrangement sleeping-wise.  So her New Year's Resolution is to sleep in the same bed as Mum and Dad. 

She considered this very carefully and constructed a plan that would enable her to insinuate her way into the bed without anyone really noticing.  In fact, she started putting her plan into action last year so that, by the time the new year rolled around, she would be ready to move on to the final step...entering the bed.  I am so proud to have her for a sister.  She is so clever.....devious but really clever. six months ago, when the weather was a bit chilly, Heidi thought the time was right for Operation Doona to be launched.  She began going into Mum's walk-in cupboard to sleep.  Mum was a bit surprised but she thought it was just that Heidi was cold and let it happen. Ha!!  Phase One.....complete.

As the months passed, Heidi continued to sleep in the walk-in wardrobe and Mum and Dad just accepted it as a new habit.  Heidi does have some some strange habits but that is a whole other story.
As the weather became warmer, Heidi moved out of the cupboard and closer to the bed, usually ending up on the floor right beside Mum or at the foot of the bed.  Mum and Dad thought she was trying to be in the cool air from the ceiling fan.  Ha!! Phase Two....complete!!

Then, last week, the moment was right.  It was hot so Mum and Dad had taken the doona off the bed so there was plenty of room at the bottom.  Heidi waited until everyone was asleep and quietly hopped up onto the bed and curled up in a tight, tight ball.  Nobody moved.  Success!  On the bed, under the fan....soooo comfortable....until....Mum decided to stretch out and roll over.  Heidi found herself back on the floor very quickly.   

So now, it has become a battle of wills.  Every night Mum and Dad go to sleep in their big bed.  Every night Heidi waits until the right moment and sneaks up onto the bed.  Some nights she gets to stay for quite a long time and some nights she is booted out almost immediately.  Heidi maintains these are only minor setbacks and that, eventually, the humans will realise that there is no point in fighting the inevitable and let her sleep in comfort. 

My only problem with this is that I can't fit up there as well.  I am just a little bit too big to be able to sneak anywhere.  So I content myself with lying across the doorway and watching as Heidi tries to keep her New Year's Resolution.

Sunday, 15 January 2012

A trampa-moline story

This is a trampa-moline.  The small humans over the road have one.  Their parents put them in there, do up the zip so they can't get out and, then, the kids bounce around screaming.  I don't know if they are having fun or if they just want to get out.

Anyway, this is a story of a brave dog called Pepsi who lives with another dog called Harriet.  Their humans have one of these trampa-molines.  Birdies like to sit on the top of the netting and sing loud songs early in the mornings especially on Sunday mornings when things are usually a bit quieter.

Well, yesterday, when the dogs were relaxing outside in the early morning coolness, some kookaburras came to sit on the netting.  Kookaburras are by nature very noisy birdies. These kookaburras started laughing at the dogs and the dogs were not impressed by this intrusion into their Sunday morning.  So those kookaburras had to be shown who was boss in that garden. 

Pepsi decided that she could get closer to the pesky things by climbing into the trampa-moline, so up she got.  The kookaburras kept laughing.  How rude! They had never seen a bouncing dog.  Pepsi started to bounce a little bit, then a bit higher.  Harriet was barking, 'Go, Pepsi, go!!'  Pepsi bounced higher....and higher ...and then she managed to grab one of those kookaburras by the wing. 
Harriet kept barking.  Pepsi kept bouncing.  The kookaburra was squawking.  The kookaburra's friends were squawking.  Bounce, bounce, squawk, squawk, bark, bark! What fun! 

But, as usually happens, the humans appeared and stopped the game.  They said that everyone was making too much noise.  Then they took the kookaburra away from Pepsi and, because it had a sore wing, took it to the vet to be looked after. 

I am not sure if any mention was made of Pepsi's skills as a trampa-molinist but I would just like to say that Heidi and I are most impressed and have added a trampa-moline to our Christmas list for Santa's next visit.  We think we would be really, really good at trampa-molining and that it would would be of great benefit to us in our on-going battle with the pussycats and possums of the neighbourhood.

Wags to you, Pepsi! an honourable mention to Harriet for her unstinting support.

Tuesday, 10 January 2012

Mum is going out.

I am feeling sad today.  Mum has gone out to work and we are all alone until she comes home.  We know she won't be long but it is very hot and we would rather be inside with the air conditioner on. 
Mum has left us bones and a big bowl of water with ice blocks in it and we can go in the garage or under the palm trees in the shade so we are okay really.  It's just that we like to have Mum around to keep an eye on her.  Heidi says I am a baby and a sook but I am not.  I am a big, brave dog and I just worry about my Mummy and I like to have her near me.
I know that she has to go out to help teach the children and that it's only for a couple of hours in the afternoons but I still get sad.  When I see her getting her teacher bag ready, I know she is going out and i put on my saddest face.  She just says, "It's okay, Troods.  I won't be long.  Don't get into any mischief."
Mischief??  Me???  As if!!!
Heidi is asleep in her nest behind the palm trees.  Wonder if I can steal her bone?

Wednesday, 4 January 2012

Behind the bamboo curtain

Down in the bottom corner of our garden there is a deep, dark, interesting place.  It is where the side fence meets the back fence and behind the massive leopard tree.  On the other side of the side fence is the park and on the other side of the back fence is where Bundy, the German Shepherd, and Otto (aka the Rat), the chihuahua live. It is always shaded and mysterious looking and, because the trees drop their litter there, it smells really interesting to a curious dog. 
Mum doesn't want us to go down there.  She says she doesn't know what lives in there.  Well, how are we supposed to find out what lives in there if we don't go exploring?
Mum has put up a light bamboo fence across the corner.  It is attached to the fences and to the leopard tree and is about 1.8m high.  Pfft!
I can't see around it.  I can't see over it even where I stand up and jump and I am not a wombat so I can't dig tunnel under it.  Heidi has tried but with no success.

Yesterday, while I was studying the bamboo fence and smelling all sorts of good smells coming from the other side, I decided that I had to get into the deep, dark, interesting corner somehow.
So, when you can't go around, and you can't go over, and you can't go under.....what do you do?
You go through.  That's what you do.

I took a run up and the biggest leap that I could and went sailing straight through the bamboo curtain. 
Mum and Dad were sitting on the patio at the time and, boy, were they surprised to see a flying dog!
One minute, there I was in the garden and, the next, I was nowhere to be seen and there was a big hole in the bamboo.  I popped my head up to smile at them. 

But then.....what was that?  A rustling?  A scuffling?  The leaves and twigs seemed to be moving under my paws.  I started to be a bit worried.  Was this where the huge, fierce, scratching, vicious tiger that attacked Heidi lived?  I couldn't see anything but I could smell interesting smells and I could hear odd things so......I wanted to get out of there.  But how?  I couldn't jump out because I couldn't get a run up.
I couldn't go around and I couldn't go under. Eeek!!

I poked my head out the hole in the bamboo curtain and whined so that Mum andDad would come and help me.  They just laughed and laughed.  I could hear the tiger coming to get me.....rustle, I really started to cry and whine and jump.  They still laughed at me.

Eventually, Dad came and undid the bamboo at one end and released me.  I got out of there as quickly as I went in....zoom.....and went to tell Heidi about my adventure behind the bamboo curtain.

P.S.  We are banned from that part of the garden until Dad comes up with a new fencing solution.

Monday, 2 January 2012

A funny weekend

We have had a funny weekend.  On Saturday morning Mum and Dad got dressed up and packed little bags and went out.  Then, in the evening, Mark and Eliza (two of our humans who don't live with us usually) arrived and stayed all night.  Mum and Dad didn't come home. 
This confused us. We had a wrestling game with Mark and our usual late night treat but still, no Mum and Dad.  In the middle of the night Heidi decided to try to find out what was happening, so she went and hopped into bed with Mark and Eliza.  She tried to ask them where Mum and Dad were but they just tipped her out onto the floor and closed the bedroom door.  I knocked but they didn't let me in.

The next day, Sunday, breakfast was not served at the usual time but dinner was early because Mark and Eliza went out. Then, later on, they came back again and stayed all night again.  By this time I was really confused and wondering where my Mummy was.  Mark said I was a big sook.!!!!  Mum and Dad came home.  We were very happy.  We did one of our best welcomes with jumping and vocalising and squeaking.  Now, everything is back to normal.  Dinner has been served at the proper time and Heidi is having her after dinner nap near the couch.
All is well in my world.